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OPENING CEREMONIES OF BURNING MAN INCLUDES LOTS OF...BURNING. ALSO LOTS OF STUPID, NAKED PEOPLE RUNNING AROUND. DEPRESSING.
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NX Camera 'walks' over to MS man in outfit covering entire head & body & circles around him
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Specialty CollectionGenre: CONTEMPORARY STOCK FOOTAGE
Description: NX LS naked woman brandishing lit torch circles tightly outfitted guy then sets him ablaze (oh! HE must be the 'Burning Man') NX WS burning man runs up steps of altar, z-in on FS of guy as he revels in crowd's cheers, p-out to LS guy under huge neon 'man' NX LS burning man runs down other side of altar & p-in for FS tall neon 'man' as it too bursts into flames. Crowd goes wild. Yawn. NX MS guy looking up at spectacle & pan-l to MS 2 women sucking on champagne bottle & basking in the glory that IS The Burning Man NX MS guy dressed as swami wiping drool off beard & p-out to WS motley crew of people looking up at burning...thing NX Low FS burning neon man w/ VAR small bottle rockets going off, p-in on MS neon man w/ tilt-d to his burning legs & p-out to FS NX FS neon man EXPLODING from legs up! Well, not a HUGE explosion--more like firecracker style. Debris flies everywhere NX Okay, if this is supposed to be a FS of burning neon guy 'ejaculating' shots of fire from his mid-region, I'm leaving NX FS burning neon guy's fire has spread to altar below. It's just a damn potpourri of fire! Panning WS across very happy crowd NX torch girl winding her camera w/ pan-l to guy wearing devil horns looking disappointed w/ tilt-d to guy taking pictures on knees NX FS Burning neon guy collapses (Hey! You can see the string!), & everyone in crowd almost comes in their pants. Excuse me NX WS entire crowd is happy & rushes to burning altar to dance around. So the whole point was to set neon guy on fire? NX CU guy w/ black & white painted face (talk head). Y'know, watching grown people act like this makes me wish fire never existed NX CU guy in Hindu get-up (talk head). Even with these nuts talking about it, they still offer no insight as to what the point is NX VAR shots of these pyromaniacs jumping around fire chaotically. Most seem to be 'forcing' themselves to have fun NX MS guy blocking face from heat. FS burning pile of debris. MS guy who says this is 'Out-fucking-rageous!' & tries to kiss a guy NX MS lady dressed in Leia's Jabba the Hutt outfit from Jedi (talk head). LARRY HARVEY?!? THAT'S who's responsible for this?!? NX From a relatively coherent lady to CU of sweaty, drunk black guy jumping up & down doing more drooling than talking at camera NX MS white-haired guy who looks out of place (talk head). MS guy yelling 'You're going down' at fire. God, I just don't know NX MS guy in space helmet walks by & flips off camera. Well, at least these people are sociable. MS guy & butch gal deep-kissing NX VAR shots fire & lunatics. MS 2 losers (boy loser & girl loser, talk head). Circling CU other cameraman (talk head) NX FS fire. High MS topless female dancing in place. The nude girls are the only 'plus' side I see about cheating these tapes NX FS guy in 'spotlight suit' lurking around carrying jug of Carlo Rossi wine. These people, conversely, are the 'minuses' NX CU future serial killer babbling into camera. MS shirtless goon assuring us he is not the 2nd coming of Christ. What a relief NX FS guys pushing around a bed on wheels w/ sailboat sail. So what do they do? They push it into the fire! Hey, why not? NX VAR shots fire & people in crowd still going bananas. Nice (admittedly) WS silhouetted crowd against flames of bonfire NX LS sparklers shooting up into air. WS silhouetted crowd against fire. MS silhouette of guy w/ Cat in Hat hat ignoring Dwight NX High WS nude girl rubbing shirtless fat guy's chest on ground. Double-yuk. VAR shots fire and loons NX CU Highly-intelligent blonde girl explaining how Burning Man is '...the most incredible ritual that we have in this century.' NX MS silhouette guy with butterfly wings against fire. FS trio of naked women dancing in silhouette. Not as good as it sounds NX High FS topless girl on knees 'taking in' fire, clothed guy next to her looks bored. FS guy vaguely dressed like Mac Tonite guy NX WS trio of topless girls dance around guy in lawn chair. Hey! That's black & white face paint guy from Line 15! Dork. NX totally nude man approaches camera. MS nude couple embracing. WS silhouette of crowd against fire w/ 3-man shoulder tower NX VAR shots smaller bonfires. VAR shots crowd & fire. Very large-breasted woman dances topless...almost gives self 2 black eyes If the fire somehow got out of control & burned up all these people, it just might singlehandedly raise the average (con't) intelligence ratio of the human gene pool
